Oh Obama... I'd never do that

My friend DK sent me this prank video where I have been singled out as the fucker responsible for Obama's defeat.

Obama's Loss Traced To Navneet

Don't be a non-voter. It could mean another four years of Republican horror.

RSS' Hindu Woman

In a revealing, though not entirely surprising, exposé of the Hindu organization, the Rashtra Swayam Sevak (RSS), Sanjana from Tehelka reports on her experience with Saffron Techies. This is fundamentalism, madrassa style, for the India shining IT sector.

To make themselves more appealing to this "educated", tech-savvy class, the RSS has forgone its strict requirements that all its cadets wear ankle length shorts. I don't know if you've seen any RSS cadets. I have, and they frequently assemble outside temples in Bombay, especially during festivals.

Even though it is so depressing to see what has happened to India, at some level of complete cynicism one can't help but laugh at the stupid khaki shorts these grown up men wear as they walk like toddlers marching towards the glorious Hindu Rashtra. Its a perfect image for Incredible India. Completely brain-washed robots ready to die or kill for their God and Nation.

Well, the Hamas of India, has upgraded its level and now holds meetings where mukhyashikshaks (headmasters) teach Hindu pride to IT professionals. This is going on, in the "all over the world-famous" Bengaluru.

The Milton Friedman Choir

Song and Music may be the antidote to jolt you awake. Here are Milton Friedman's words presented by the most surreal Milton Friedman Choir or more aptly, a requiem for your dreams.

M. Friedman is dead, it is perhaps time to rethink his ideas.

Chomsky on the Financial Crisis

Traveling around now a days so can't find much time to blog properly, but till I actively resume: Here's Noam writing in the Irish Times about the U.S Financial crisis and its anti-democratic nature.

Anti-democratic nature of US capitalism is being exposed

By Noam Chomsky

THE SIMULTANEOUS unfolding of the US presidential campaign and unraveling of the financial markets presents one of those occasions where the political and economic systems starkly reveal their nature.

Passion about the campaign may not be universally shared but almost everybody can feel the anxiety from the foreclosure of a million homes, and concerns about jobs, savings and healthcare at risk.

The initial Bush proposals to deal with the crisis so reeked of totalitarianism that they were quickly modified. Under intense lobbyist pressure, they were reshaped as "a clear win for the largest institutions in the system . . . a way of dumping assets without having to fail or close", as described by James Rickards, who negotiated the federal bailout for the hedge fund Long Term Capital Management in 1998, reminding us that we are treading familiar turf.

No Spoofs Please... We're Hindus

You either get it or you don't. Devendra Banhart's solitary claim to fame, at least in pop culture, so far, has been that he's Natalie Portman's ex-boyfriend. On his own, he comes across as a psychedelic rebel looking to affront. He ain't no Allen Ginsberg when it comes to the standard of psychedelic rebels but I thought he was amusing to read at least in this article that he wrote after his break up with Natalie Portman. He's also a songwriter, singer and a musician whose career, well at least I haven't been following.

His new music video for the song Carmensita, from his album Smokey Rolls Down Thunder Canyon, is a spoof of Ramayana and has gotten Hindu Religious scholars all riled up.

You're all a bunch of Wankers

That giant database of information, Google, is at the command of our demands. A statistical aggregate of our searches within this information offers a peek into the Zeitgeist, defined as:

zeitgeist | Pronunciation: 'tsIt-"gIst, 'zIt | Function: noun | Etymology: German, from Zeit (time) + Geist (spirit) | Date: 1884 | Meaning: the general intellectual, moral, and cultural climate of an era.

So what is the general intellectual, moral, and cultural climate of our era? All trends seem to suggest that it is Page 3 bullshit and you're all a bunch of voyeuristic wankers.

Mickey Must Die!

While Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert remain favorites, I have a problem with them. They are too intelligent. When one is looking for dumb stuff, you know the kind that is sensitive to the needs of the Lowest Common Denominator, it is far more rewarding to turn to self-proclaimed Religious custodians. My favorite has been televangelist Pat Robertson who among other things had this to say about the feminist movement:

(T)he feminist agenda is not about equal rights for women. It is about a socialist, anti-family political movement that encourages women to leave their husbands, kill their children, practice witchcraft, destroy capitalism and become lesbians.

Nice going there preacher but I think I've found a strong contender. The Saudi cleric Sheikh Muhammad Al-Munajid had this to say about women in Olympics:

How come modern sports - especially women's sports - involve the exposure of private parts? It is well known that the Olympics - both in the past and the upcoming games... the world's worst display of women's clothing is the women's Olympics. No exposure of women's private parts on a global scale could make Satan happier than Olympic games that include women's sports.

Wrestling involves the exposure of women's private parts. Even the promotion of the competitions is done by scantily clad women. This is done at the beginning of the match, in the middle, and at the end, or so I hear... the matches are promoted by half-naked women.

Mackerel Money

We are all aware that our currencies are legal tender. A Dollar bill, for example, is a note issued by the US Federal Reserve and clearly and coldly states: "This Note is Legal Tender for all Debts, Public and Private". It is signed by the Treasurer of the United States.

The Indian Rupee is a note issued by the Reserve Bank of India and guaranteed by the Central Government. It has a tone that reads more like a dramatic oath: "I Promise to pay the bearer the Sum of Five Rupees" (or whatever amount is boldly printed as the number on that note). It is signed by the Governor of the Reserve Bank of India so probably the "I" in the promise refers to the person holding Governor's office.

This piece of paper is accepted by those who believe in the stated promise as a legitimate form of exchange for goods or services. It also means that if I were to pay a visit to the Governor, with this legal tender in hand, he'd be bound to give me the "Sum" of five rupees. Traditionally that "Sum" is supposed to be in Gold. It is inherently understood that this piece of paper is worthless and behind every such piece of paper issued, the Government has enough Gold, Silver or some commodity of "Real Value" guaranteed, otherwise that banking system is counterfeit and can be sued for bankruptcy. This is known as the Gold Standard. The quantum of Gold actually available with the RBI or its subsidiaries is not revealed in India. It would be foolish to think that there is so much Gold inside the RBI except for a Bollywood film. In reality it is more like this: A rupee can be returned to the issuing bank in exchange for a rupee worth of the bank’s assets [link]. This shift from actual Gold to something of "Real Value" is enforced by an order (fiat) of the Government and hence the term Fiat Currency.

If Voting Changed Anything They'd Abolish It

In 1987 Ken Livingston, that magical aberration in British Politics, published his autobiography with a really honest title: If Voting Changed Anything They'd Abolish It.

That title came to mind when I read my friend Aarti's piece on Pen Tehsil's referendum, a must read, where they refused Mukesh Bhai's brotherly love in favor of keeping their ancestral lands.

And then this morning, the Slimes had this article where they seem surprised and shocked in their headline: Anti-Nano farmers in Andhra too.

Why won't those illiterate, anti-development motherfuckers give up their land? Can't they see that this is for their and India's greater good? Take the money and get out, go live in a slum in Mumbai.

I wouldn't be surprised if soon this stupid, new experiment of democratic referendum is taken off the tables and we return to the tried and tested use of brutal force to acquire land. This kind of voting is changing things and making it difficult for India Inc. Change is a constant only as long as it constantly favors the powerful.

Update: Here's a Social Impact Assessment Report prepared by Tata Institute of Social Sciences for Sea King Infrastructure Ltd. (Sea King is the promoter for the Reliance SEZ) [PDF Link]

Mapping Sarah

In this hilarious rant against the profound dumbness of Sarah Palin, Aden Renkai puts her in her place:

Sarah Palin is a stupid, self important, ignorant bitch who I wouldn’t put in charge of wiping her own ass. And it’s not just that she’s dumb - which she is - it’s that she’s willfully ignorant of the facts and yet absolutely dead-bang certain that she’s right about her opinions. It’s more of this “governing from the gut” bullshit that we’ve been Chimping along with for the past eight years.

And here's Palin's debate flowchart from Aden Renkai's caustically funny take on the vice-presidential debate.Sarah Palin Debate Flowchart

Thanks Adam.

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